BLACK Friday - Never Again!

Well, I looked up "Black Friday" for a student. All of you probably knew what it meant all the time, but... It means that retailers will go from "aka ji" - being in the red financially, to being in the black - making a profit.

We were not able to help them out much.

We went to the mall. I am serious. I haven't even BEEN to a mall in well over 2 1/2 years, and even then, I don't think I went to this one.

Now, talk about Culture Shock! Or Reverse Culture Shock! I used to love to take the bus down to the mall with a friend when I was in Jr. High. I used to love to go to the mall with a friend when I was in college. I used to love to go to the mall by mySELF when I worked at a college in the mid-west. But, to be fair, those days weren't Black Fridays. Did they even HAVE Black Friday back then?

My advice for those who want to acquaint themselves with this US custom, is to go through the following steps. Preferably - one step per year, unless you go to the mall often.

1. Drive by the mall
2. Find a parking space at the mall
3. Find the entrance to the mall near a department store you want to visit. Do not Enter!
4. Try to come up with tricks to remember where you parked the car. Do NOT leave the car this year!
5. Enter the door of the department store you want to visit. Try to find the escalators, elevators, restrooms, other exits to the outside and...if you aren't too exhausted - the exit to the REST OF THE MALL. DO NOT leave the department store this year.
6. Enter the same department store and try to find the section of the store that has clothes that FIT YOU! HAHAHAHAH! Good luck!
7. Now you are well on your way to passing the Department Store test! It is time to venture beyond the Department Store entrance to the REST OF THE MALL! Do NOT enter any stores, just try to find the Food Court. Priorities!
8. OK, you can park, get in and out of a Dept. Store, change floors, find a restroom when needed, walk through the REST OF THE MALL and even find nutritious? sustenance. You are ready to explore the rest of the STORES! First, go into every single store along the right side of the MALL ENTRANCE. If you always keep to your right you will eventually find your way out of any maze. It said so in a book. Walk in and out and TRY to remember if there is anything in said store you ever want to see again. Of course, said store will either move or close before next year, but...this is a trial run. Practice is EVERYTHING!
9. Now you are ready to visit the MALL on a weekend! HURRAY!
10. Well, it is finally Black Friday Year. You have taken 9 long years to prepare for this day. Don't expect too much from yourself. Don't let your kid get a glimpse of the man in the red suit and hat who, "Even if Santa is just pretend, Mama, will he come to OUR house?" "Why is he not pretend in Japan and pretend in AmerEEEEka?" And ... BUY SOMETHING!

As for me, I am going to the mall during the most expensive boring season when NO ONE is around. Maybe a Tuesday morning. And I will keep my hand on the right hand side wall. And tie a ribbon to the car!

Thankful: Well, that we got home and that the hose that had broken in the laundry room was in the shop, so the shop with lots of holes in the floor and walls is what flooded all over and...I'm trying to find a reason to be thankful that it was hot water that gushed all night! ARGH!