The Nap Wagon

Or, I should say, the "no nap wagon." Last week, after a 3 hour nap, Jun was up till around 11pm. In bed, but...awake. So, I determined to CUT THE NAP! Luckily the next day we had an afternoon outing planned, so, Jun stayed awake, had an early dinner and was asleep by 7:30 - a very nice time to go to bed, I thought. So, the next day I worked hard to keep her awake all afternoon again. She was much happier than the day before, and went down well. "YEAH," I thought, "This is going to work!" I kept up the good fight through Sunday. Jun went to bed quickly and slept well. She woke up happy in the mornings, and life was grand.

Except for me. I'm used to going to bed with Jun at 8:30. Whether she falls asleep or not, I DO! I like my sleep. When Jun goes to bed early, I stay up so I can have some time for MYSELF. Way way too late. (My way way too late is 10 or 11 pm.) I've been walking around in a fog all week. I'm exhausted.

So, as I was going to be gone yesterday, I suggested Jun and Daddy take a nap. She slept for 1 1/2 hours and went to bed nicely at 8:30. Then came today. We both fell asleep at 12:30. She just woke up. It's 3:45. Another 11 pm night, I think, but I feel much much better! Guess we are back to nap times for a little longer! As MY mom used to say, "Go to sleep, Mama's tired!"

How to Solve the Nap Problem

This spring I was lamenting the changes in Jun's sleep schedule. Afternoon naps made for VERY late bed times which made for a very grumpy Mama. However, I knew we had a trip to the US coming up in June, and also knew naps are very good for kiddos and jet lag - so, decided to quit naps AFTER we got back and got recovered from our trip. The thing is...in the US, AND, after we got back to Japan - Jun took stellar naps and went right to sleep each night! I was SHOCKED! And very very happy! Wow!

As is usual, just when I recognized a wonderful thing, felt the awe of it and the grace surrounding it...just as I began to rejoice - things changed!

Naps are pretty good, but bedtime is getting later and later and later. Not the "turn off the lights" time - but the close your eyes and MOUTH and SLEEP time. The last few nights I have been telling her to "HUSH! Mama is trying to sleep!" Something is wrong with this picture!

So, I guess I will just have to take another trip to the US pronto!

HAHAHA! Just kidding! But...you should have seen Ryu's face when I made that comment this morning! Precious!

4:30 is NOT Morning at Our House - Jun!

Dearest Jun,

4:30am is NOT morning! Did you hear that? Even if the delivery trucks are beeping their back up beeps outside our apt. building, it is NOT Morning! Even if the newspaper motorcycles are whizzing noisily past, it is NOT morning. Even if the sun IS up enough to read a book with big print in the living room, it is NOT morning. Even if the garbage trucks are down below picking up trash, it is NOT morning. Regardless if you went to bed early or late, it is NOT morning. Whether you had an afternoon nap the day before or NOT, it is NOT morning.

So, if you wake up AGAIN, tomorrow, at 4:30, GO POTTY like Mama asks you to. Mama will carry you and do EVERYTHING FOR YOU! Just do it! Mama will lay down in YOUR bed with you! Mama will hold you! Mama will rub your back. Mama will do ANYTHING FOR YOU! JUST GO BACK TO SLEEP! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASEEEEEE!

Love, your tired Mama

Project: Keep Jun Awake!

When Jun was a "tiny tiny baby" I was always careful to be sure she got her sleep. However, she and I were usually up for about 2 hours in the middle of the night...every night. One night a friend from church offered to have her spend the night at their house (she's a nurse with 2 kids), so I could get some sleep. Well, she kept Jun up till 11 (I put her down around at 6 or so then), and said Jun slept through the night so well. I also heard from her daughter that Jun had cried for hours before that 11 pm bedtime, and I took one look at Jun's sleep starved (no morning nap) face the next morning, and, of course, regretted my decision 100%. Later that evening I regretted it even more when Jun started having really minor seizures in her face and body. Grimacing, body stiffening, and looking like she had just wet her pants. We took her to a specialist and got her as checked out as you can a 8-9 month old baby. She came out with flying colors. It was very moving to see the CT of her brain, but that is another post. Really. The seizures stopped, but the scare in my heart didn't, so I have sacrificed my own sleep, outside activities, etc., to make sure she gets enough sleep, including NAP time!

That said, (and I realize this is NOT my first post on Jun's nap time/bed time issues, but...), after a 1 hour nap or a 3 1/2 hour nap, she can't seem to fall asleep till 10-11 pm. That is too late for this Mama!

So, yesterday we took the bull by the horns and Kept Jun Awake! She and I came home from 2 parks, (More on that later too!) shopping, riding the BUS, etc, at about 6:15, and Jun fell asleep when I walked in the door with her in my arms! She slept till 4:45 am. I tried to keep her up today, but...she is crashed on the floor next to me - out cold! I failed today! But, I also know she needs some rest. I hope tonight isn't too late!!!

She and I are going to the States in a few weeks for a few weeks. I know naps are a big help in overcoming jet-lag, so I will probably cut her afternoon nap completely when we get back. Until then, it was SOOO nice to eat a quite and leisurely meal WITH my husband and chat! It's been a long long time!!! SMILE!

Uhhhh, Yeah...

Last night was one of those relative rare nights of a busy week when it took Jun 3 hours to finally fall asleep at 11:00. I suppose I dozed before she finally fell asleep, and I suppose I dozed afterwards, but when I got out of bed and QUIETLY snuck out of the bedroom and sat on the couch at 6:30, it was with dreams of a LONG and QUIET morning all to myself.

At 7:00 Jun slid the connecting door open and emerged with a smile!

Jun: Whatcha doing, Mama?

Me: Just sitting here on the couch, Junnie.

Jun: Waiting for Junnie to wake up?

Me: Uhhh, yeah...

And it has been a long day up to this point! Her nap didn't help. She is crying as I type. Gotta go!

That's What "They" Meant!

Jun is just one week shy of 2 years and 10 months old. And...today was the first time I have ever carried her home, asleep, without a sling or stroller. Everyone said a sleeping baby/child is much heavier than one who is awake. Yes. Now I know what they are talking about. Plus, head, arms, legs flapping in the wind don't make the haul lighter. But the cheek next to your panting mouth makes kissing them easy. And, I'm sure someone...HONEY!!!...will rub these sore shoulders soon!

We are traditionally (is 2 years and 10 months long enough to be tradition?) a nap-in-bed family. However, we are working on shorter naps and easier bedtimes. Practice will someday make perfect. I believe! Until then, I will try to remember to bring the sling or stroller when we are "staying awake!!!" in the afternoons!

Thanks! And, Progress?

Thanks for your kind words of encouragement. After another day...that was not happy, and ended up being napless, Jun and I went to bed and...eventually she fell asleep a little after eight last night. Earlier than usual, but on a napless day, every minute helps. She slept till 7:30 this morning, instead of having to be dragged out of bed at 9:00. I've felt like I had a teenager in the house the past few days. Not that I minded mornings to myself, but...I do like to sleep at night!

This afternoon, after nap time (she slept 1+ hours), Jun and I made this poster. Can you see it? The picture is off my cell phone.

1. Brush teeth at 7:00
2. Go potty
3. Change into pajamas
4. Have a drink of water
5. Clean our noses (she's had a cold)
6. Find Kitty-chan and pink blankie
7. Go to the bed (futon)
8. Read some books and a Bible story
9. Pray with Mama and Daddy
10. Play Jump around the Circle with Daddy
11. Lay down in bed
12. Get kisses
13. Lights out and go to sleep at 7:45

As I write, she is on the drink of water with Daddy. Any prayers that she goes to sleep by 8:30?

So

Two out of Three Isn't Bad!

Thank you all for your comments on "Breaking the Binkie." We did it slowly and over two weeks. The first week, not using it for nap time, and the second, not using it at all. We discussed it for a week or so before starting, so Jun was pretty much on board before we started. While we were in the midst of "breaking the binkie," I read this post from "Do they have salsa in China." The comments were quite interesting!

A few interesting "extras" came about as Jun quit using her binkie. First, her attachment to all of the rest of her bed menagerie and blankies became less severe. She would wake up in the morning and come into the kitchen...ALONE! She just seemed more mature all around. Many of my Japanese friends here nurse till their babies are around two years old. When they wean the children, they see a sudden growth in maturity and independence that they all comment on in wonder. Seems like breaking the binkie kind of had the same results in Jun.

Right after the binkie habit was broken, Jun came down with a mild case of the "runs." I reminded her that using her diaper during this time would just make things "owie", and told her she should use the potty. She has been "practicing" using the potty for 9 months or so. Or not practicing, as we had "boycotting of potty time" too. Anyway, I put her in "big girl undies," and ... she is potty trained. Once again, I don't know how this happened. Other than, Jun decided, so Jun did it. I wonder if I am really parenting this child, or should just sit back on the sofa and watch.

Well, since things were going so well, I decided to once again tackle the "sleep situation" we have battled unsuccessfully for, well two years and eight months, now! It is not a terrible situation, but one I think should be "adjusted" before Jun turns three, for various family reasons. Anyway, I sat on our bed, put her in her futon (right next to our bed), and told her to go to sleep, while I read a book. Just like they do in "Goodnight Moon." Well, when I make changes, I tend to start at nap time, but, after two 1/2 days of crying and playing and...not going to sleep till Mama got firm, I gave up the good fight, and lay down with her again. My reasoning? Well, Jun is a toddler, and we don't spend much time cuddling during the awake hours because, Jun is on the go. So, we cuddle, she goes to sleep, sometimes I do to, and ... we wait for another day to, try try again!

Sleep Update

Well, sleep training for the Mama has been going pretty well. Mostly because I wrote about it here, and some of you were so kind as to comment. I feel responsible to KEEP to my new resolutions and stay "on the wagon". Nine out of the last ten nights I have NOT fallen asleep permanently when Jun does. I sit up in bed and, though I do nod off at times, my head hitting the wall seems to wake me back up! HAHAH! Though last night was an exception, I HAVE been staying up till between 9:30 and 10:30. I sleep much harder and better through the night.

Last night we moved Jun onto a futon next to our bed. She is SO excited to have her own bed with a Miffy-chan mattress. It took her forever to fall asleep in her new bed. Probably wrestling with Daddy for an hour before bedtime didn't help, but, Daddy is rarely home in the evenings, so it was a treat to hear them laughing and playing.

I am writing about this today so I will feel guilty if I go off to sleep too early and mess up my new sleep habits! And Jun's!

BTW - did you read this post? I would love to hear your comments!

Sleep Training - for the Mama

I'm so tired again! still! always!

The hardest part of becoming a parent for me, has been the sleep deprivation. Jun was pretty tiny, to me, when she was born, (2,400 gm.). For the first year I was really worried about her getting enough to eat, so I gave her nightly bottles. And she stayed up and played for two hours. And I tried to keep her quiet and put her back to sleep. Because Daddy had to leave for work at 6 am, and hadn't gotten home till about 10 or 11 p.m. I was a sleep deprived mess. I was so tired I couldn't even sleep when Jun napped. She might wake up. Like I said, I was a crazy sleep deprived mess.

Well, about two months after her first birthday, we did the two week weaning plan, and sometime after that Jun started sleeping through the night. Hmmm. Wonder of wonders. However, by then, she was sleeping with me. Japanese made cribs are really tiny and the side that lowers is made like a ladder. And Jun is a climber.

So, when I stopped feeding her to sleep, I started laying down with her, waiting for her to fall asleep. Our one and only bedroom is no where near childproof, so I couldn't leave her in there alone. My friend's baby took about 20 minutes to fall asleep, with Mama laying near her. Jun? Usually at least 40 minutes, if not an hour. Well, by then I was pretty tired myself, and would often conk out with her.

Fine and good, but Jun's bedtime is 7:30. Jun sleeps through the night, but I wake up at about 10:00. Then I am up for hours! When I finally get sleepy again, if Jun IS going to wake up in the middle of the night, it is THAT time. Once we all get settled down again, it is 5:00, and Daddy is up to make morning coffee. ARGH!

So, Daddy and Jun are good sleepers, and I am going downhill fast! I try to drink a cup of tea late in the afternoon, hoping it will keep me awake, but...like as not, it doesn't help. Daddy gets home earlier than before, but not early enough to rescue me from my evening "nap". I feel like I have jet lag and NO control about NOT going to sleep. I have tried to use my cell phone alarm on vibration under my pillow, but I so don't want to wake Jun up. But, maybe I will try it again.

Anyone else out there poor sleepers? What is your problem and what do you do???? HELP!