The Plan

Well, this is THE week. We need to be in our new house on Thursday. This means that:

1. We need to pack up this house. So, you ask, why am I wasting time writing a post. Good question. I'm a practiced procrastinator.
2. We need electricity to the cooking stove in the new house - Go Dad, Go!
3. We need to finish some of the walls in the bathroom and put the cabinets up in the kitchen so...
4. the plumber can come finish putting the sinks in.
5. We will finish the floor in only the "master" bedroom this week, and move in there.
6. Then we will put the rest of our stuff in a storage shed.
7. Then we will clean up this house.
8. Then we will take Ryu to the airport for his 2 week trip to Japan. Someone (me) made him a ticket reservation with a departure time of 5:30 am. Roads should be clear, at least!
9. Then Jun and I will commute to our church in this town to attend Vacation Bible School.
10. My Mom and Dad will go home and mow their own lawn, look out their own windows (which are clean), sit on their own chairs, eat their own food, and REST!
11. Jun and I will camp for a week or so in the new house and REST!
12. Oh, and I'm on church bulletin duty this summer. Obviously something I committed to before knowing we were going to be MOVING and going crazy. Oh well!
13. Aaaaand, I have an interview at the local Community College for an ESL class this summer. We'll see!

So, anyway, that is The Plan. I so so hope it works out! I'm looking forward to the REST!

Tsugi kara tsugi he

Kind of means, "One thing after another." Or, "If it isn't one thing, it's the next."

Kind of means, "Our friend fixed our leaking toilet and now the shower leaks - again."

Kind of means, "I got the bird (25ish lb. turkey) cooked and delivered, and this afternoon a mouse made its appearance under the desk where I am NOW SITTING!"

Kind of means, "After all the laundry we took to grandma's, why is there a full laundry basket at HOME?"

Kind of means, "When I made Jun wear her nice new white tennis shoes to church, why didn't I make her take them OFF before she went outside and played in the MUD?"

Kind of means, "When you bounce a check, your library book turns up overdue too."

Kind of means, "When your car gets a new transmission, you freak out when the anti-lock brakes shake the whole car on a rainy day."

Kind of means: Life is a journey. With mountains and valleys. Rivers and deserts. And if you spend time, like I have today, reviewing all the less than great stuff, you will run out of energy to deal with the less than great stuff that is sure to come tomorrow. Because, life is a journey! Even when it rains!

Thankful? Hmmm. For the sweet little girl in the beautiful dress, with a dirty face who sat on my lap at church tonight and gave me a hug. I don't even know her name. But she was sure a touch of sunshine! Nope - not Jun. Another of God's angels!

Is Multi-Tasking all that it Advertises?

After a nice day with Jun on Monday, I began to think about why Jun's pace was so restful, though we traveled all over Tokyo.

First, we didn't run, but ambled. That helped. And, unlike at home, we just did one thing at a time. I wasn't running around doing laundry, cleaning the kitchen, making granola, working on the computer, etc, etc. at the same time that I was asking her to help fold the socks and clean up her books and and and and. We just did one thing at a time. When we got off the train, we started to look for the next one. Got off the bus, looked for the station, etc. One thing at a time.

My husband is, as another blogger recently wrote about HER husband, a man with great tunnel vision. Though it drives me crazy at times, he DOES finish one task before starting another. Now, I think I can get LOTS more done in one day than he does...but NOTHING is completely finished.

So, though I've been a bit proud of my ability to multi-task, and really enjoy the exhilaration of being BUSY and USING my time fully...I think I've been deceiving myself. The stress I felt on Sunday was a good reminder. I have a few long months (years?) to go before our family is fully settled in the US. Running at top speed and in circles won't be helpful!

That being said, I think multi-tasking is a habit that is a bit hard to break. My husband says women HAVE to multi-task. Well, probably not all women, but if one is to do child care, work part time and have dinner on the table at night, some multi-tasking is necessary...but I would rather have peace than a clean house. (Ryu might have other opinions on this! HAHAH!)

So, one step at a time. I'll try to pace myself and enjoy the journey of our international move and relocation and "new life." And NOT stress my child out in the process!!!

Don't Worry!

I wrote earlier this year about giving up stress. It has been going pretty well. However, on this past trip home, two rather unlikely sources helped me "break down" my stress into two categories. Worry and Fear.

With a 5-6 hour layover in Seattle, Jun and I visited the shops quite a few times. For essentials. Chips, crackers, water, a gift or two, and...a MAGAZINE!

I devoured this magazine once we got on the plane. This doesn't necessarily mean it is an excellent magazine, but is definitely a reflection on my lack of recreational reading materials in ENGLISH!

Good Housekeeping, July 2009, page 121, The Treat Trap by Geneen Roth. The article starts out with the connection between eating and worrying. Well, I don't eat when I worry. I end up loosing weight with worry. So, that part nearly lost me. Then, the author told about all of the energy she used to use in worrying about what MIGHT happen. However, in real life - the TERRIBLE things that did happen to her, and that she dealt with just fine - were NOT things she had even THOUGHT of!

Ahhhh! I said to myself. The things I have worried about in the past have never come true! And, I too have had to deal with big things "off the cuff," and have done a decent job of them.

So, my belief in God and belief in myself are the right path to stop worrying. That being said, sometimes I worry that I am not worrying (preparing enough) for the future. But...the worry cart is NOT going to be pulled by me, with God's help!

Cutting the Stress

There are some things I have started or done recently to cut the stress on me and my family. Not big stress things, just irritating things. So, I thought I'd tell you all about them!!!

• We bought a kitchen/dining table for 500 yen - 5 USD! I blogged about this earlier, but last night as Ryu was at our 18 inch counter preparing the yaki-niku with the last of the sauce he calls Megu's Megumi (Megu's Mom made it for us!), I stood at the table and cut vegetables! Two work stations in our kitchen! SOOOOOOO wonderful!
• I was talking with two different Japanese friends at different times. It was getting on towards dinner time so I asked what they were going to make for dinner. Both had already made dinner that MORNING!?!?!?! I was speechless. Then, realizing I am much more energetic in the morning than in the evening, started making most of our dinners in the morning. And it's fun!
• As dinner is made in the morning, Jun and I have time in the evenings to PICK UP before Daddy gets home! This makes DADDY soooooo happy! Us too!
• Along the dinner lines, I started making weekly menus again - after three years! HAHAHA! Though I love to read recipes on the internet, I don't have THAT much time to prepare menus. So, each week I take a different cookbook down, flip through it, make out a menu and shopping list, and - after shopping - am good to go. Ryu is SOOO happy! I use one cookbook, so I only have to write a page number for the recipe. Lazy!?!? And, I add internet recipes as I remember them.
• I said I would get progressive lenses (glasses) if a baby came to us. But, three years ago, still no baby. So, I got my regular distance/eye stress glasses and have made do with about 5-6 pairs of reading glasses over the last three years. With a baby who is "almost three!", this has been a bit stressful. I have different strength reading glasses for each kind of distance. Computer, reading, general seeing at close distances, etc. And I can NEVER find the ones I need. And, sometimes can just never find ANY of them. I am always asking Ryu or Jun to help me find my glasses. And, that just gets old for them and me. Too much time wasted. So, I bit the bullet and now have a pair of progressive lenses. The first afternoon I was fine. The next day was great. The day after that I couldn't see anything at all. I have not been in focus for years, so my eyes and mind need to remember to CARE that things CAN be in focus if I move my head just the right way. But, what a relief!
• I also went to a long-delayed doctors appt. The "yearly exam" has been put off for about 4 years! Getting caught up on these things removes one more boring conversation topic and fears of...what if!
• Yesterday, as I was collapsed on the couch after dinner and wearily getting Jun ready for bed, I realized again how much happier my evenings are on the days I can take a nap with Jun. It means NO "Kim-only" time, but, with my nap, I enjoy my family MUCH MUCH more!
• I made a "wardrobe" for Jun out of a rather deep book-case. I put three drawers in it for undies/socks, and one for pj's, and one for fall sweaters. I put a curtain rod in the middle section to hang her beautiful dresses (Thanks M, A, and H!), so she can easily reach and select a dress - she usually wears dresses everyday now - with pants if it is cold!
• Ryu called our Realtor twice this past month and we have new screens on all our windows and a new door handle on the bath!!!! YEAH! Big irritations GONE!
• I have a policy for Jun to have an adult friend with her in the Phonics class, so I can actually teach and not just chase Jun around the room! Thanks everyone!
• Jun has been telling me "no" in Japanese over the last year, and it never has bothered me. This past week she started looking me in the eye and telling me "no" in English! THAT hit a button. I was speechless! Then I prayed and took a clue from Jun. When I tell Jun "no" she often asks me why. So, when she tells me "no", I answer with a "why?" And it has resulted in interesting conversations and less "no's" recently.
• OH, and for anyone with little kids, this is a GREAT STRESS RELIEVER!!! Jun LOVES to blow bubbles. In the bath, outside, ANYWHERE! And, it seems we are ALWAYS out of bubbles liquid. And the stores around us sell it in tiny tiny bottles only. I've not found a re-fill jug yet! The other day my dear friend Kaoru showed me how to make some with stuff I actually have in my kitchen. Put 2-3 drops of dish soap in the little bottle, add a bit of water, put about 1/16-1/8 tsp. of katakuriko - potato starch (I wonder if corn starch would work too?) in, add a little more water, shake it up and wait for a couple of minutes. This makes STRONG bubbles Jun holds in her hand! YEAH!

What else? Hmmm. A few more areas of stress to DEAL with are getting the full year prepped for my Toddler's and Phonics classes. The prepping in general is not bad at all, but...first the church's CD player died. So, I carry our portable Walkman to church each week (only forgotten once so far), and connect it to speakers, and... Then I tried to burn CD's of just the songs I wanted to use on that day. And the CD player doesn't read CD-RW CD's apparently. And yesterday my computer refused to burn to CD-R discs when it had done so quite nicely only a few weeks ago. Ate two CD's. Next the OHP died, so I have to print out copies of the song lyrics (the class is really for the Mamas to learn the songs and dances and do them at home with their kiddos), and make enlarged copies at the Convenience Store, tape them together, etc. So, the OTHER stresses are driving me crazy with those classes again.

A trip to the dentist is also on my to-do list. Hmmmm. Oh, and COSTCO is coming to a station "near" us soon!!!!! That will be sooooo nice - I hope!

Well, do you have any tips or projects you are doing to make your life easier?

Something Broke!

I have always been affected by stress. I remember the stomach aches that came from attending a new Jr. High school and the months of bullying I went through.

I used to carry stress in my stomach alone until my mid-30's, when it attacked my chest and breathing.

Changing environments and jobs helped a lot in reducing stressful situations. Marrying Ryu reduced them even more, as he is very layed back and "holds me back" from stressful situations that I would plunge myself into.

But, I have the ability to get stressed over even little and fun things. And to feel the stress, react to the stress with grumpiness and irritation, and have no idea what it is I'm stressed about, until I really look at my schedule about upcoming things. Ahh, the talents I have! And the patience my husband has!

Well, late this winter I went through two months of very very high level stress, preparing for an important meeting for our family. I was a nervous wreck. Then the meeting came, which I was calm throughout, and, it turns out, the timing of the meeting was nearly a year too early. Sorry to be so vague, but hang with me!

I turned to my husband, who had felt ABSOLUTELY NO stress during those months - at least about the upcoming meeting - and handed the ball to him. "Honey, I said, all of this stress has been for YOU and your future! You worry about it! I'm DONE!" And I walked away (figuratively speaking!). I also handed our banking responsibilities over to him, and walked away.

I am not sure how much of my current serenity is due to those two decisions and how much is due to trying to read the Bible and pray every day. But...I am not stressed! Stressful events have been coming one after another. And I feel no stress. I keep thinking, "Something is broken inside of me! I feel calm! Am I unconnected? Do I just not care/mind?" I don't know, but I am surely much easier to be around. Things like new classes, speeches, visits to the in-laws, etc. haven't thrown me like they usually do.

Well, something MAY be broken, but I hope it doesn't get fixed!